Wednesday, 30 November 2016

Worm burden

I really have no time to write a post, but I can't bear that sad, sad, last one to stay at the top of the page any longer, so here is my Yorkshire Vet email conversation with B last night (parts in " " direct quotes from last night's episode).


B: "CUSTARDY PUS".

B: "Worm burden"

E: Worm burden is actually my stage name.

B: I would like to be clear that because my birthday is next Monday and you have already had your birthday you have to let me have Julian.

E: Nope nope nopety nope.

B: Birthday. Penumbra*. *mic drop*

E: ACTUALLY MY BIRTHDAY PENUMBRA HASN'T ACTUALLY FINISHED YET ACTUALLY.

B: DUELLING PENUMBRAS. RuPaul would know what to do.

E: Veterinary themed runway and lip snynch!

E: ps. I would watch the hell out of a "cat rodeo"

B: I am currently of the opinion that separating "cat rodeo" from animal themed lip synch for your life is a mistake.

E: I realised that as soon as I pressed send.

(*Birthday penumbra, B coinage, the days preceding and following your birthday during which everyone is obliged to be super nice to you. Can be extended at will. Obviously.)


Other thoughts:

Current weather (-3°C, beautiful winter sunshine) is my absolute favourite even though I am wearing a woolly hat, origins unknown, possibly left behind by Prog Rock, in the house. I don't think it's his favourite weather though:


I've just been made aware of this delicious salad and it has made me wholly hysterical. Something about the jaunty music + horrified comments + huffy replies.

New Belinda Bauer (The Beautiful Dead) = extremely gripping and also I am hoarding that new Scandi BBC4 number, so I am sorted, crime-wise.

You? Any small salvations in the ongoing garbage fire? I would like some comments for my birthday penumbra, please.

33 comments:

Bryony said...

Love the idea of birthday penumbra. I insist on a birthday month so it starts a good 3 weeks before the day. Also, why are best hats usually the least stylish?

Clare Taylor said...

So here is this, for your Birthday penumbra. Not sure if you're a cat person but given your interest in the Vet, thought you might find it interesting...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HlKYtLlvRlU

Nimble said...

I handcrafted a wreath covered with pinecones and put it on my door. This may be the sum total of my seasonal output. But at the moment I am WINNING!

Crazy Mom! said...

Happy birthday. My aunt celebrates her birthday for an entire month.

And you, my dear, are just a baby!

kath said...

Happy Birthday. Winter birthdays we have to take the celebrations where we can. Have you seen Hunt for the Wilderpeople?

Stacy said...

I second Kath--I loved Hunt for the Wilderpeople. So good and the NZ accents and scenery are great.

ellen kirkendall said...

Is it appropriate to offer you a "happy penumbra"?

Unknown said...

I wish I had a cute animal video to offer you for your birthday penumbra, but my life has been overtaken by worrying about the nutters who have taken over this fair land. I have started my own birthday penumbra (I love this term and shall be spreading it far and wide), which shall be extensive this year as I am facing a Giant Scary Birthday, by purchasing three pair of shoes on the Interwebs, along with some cozy cashmere and a festive holiday top. Anticipating my packages' arrival at my frankly horrifying workplace is pretty much the only thing getting me out of bed this week.

frau antje said...

Penumbra: Where the light from the source of illumination is partly cut off.
You and B have nailed the Zeitgeist, props...or, as Aretha said, R-E-S-P-E-C-T.

Anonymous said...

Dear Waffle, wishing you a lovely birthday penumbra. You deserve only the best, especially around your birthday.
I'm in a strange place: on the one hand I received some Very Good News and on the other, acting on the good news like any reasonable adult would is scaring the sh*t out of me as it involves moving countries, disrupting the lives of the rest of the family and in general, considerable upheaval. It's something I've wanted for quite some time, but now that it's actually happening, it's terrifying! To make matters worse, my other half is having qualms about whether to accompany me and has hinted that perhaps I should go by myself first and see how things go without uprooting everyone else. This is really worrying me as I just can't imagine myself flying over and back and being a non-resident mother hen most of the time. On the one hand, I'm really convinced it's the best possible prospect for me and the rest of the family in the long term (work I know I will love, much better job security, very good hours, paid holidays, a career ladder and a pension, of all things!) but on the other hand, change is very hard and it means moving out of my comfort zone entirely, taking a huge risk and dragging others along as well. I worry that everyone is going to resent me and that things won't work out the way I want them to. However, an opportunity like this happens once in a lifetime and there are lots of things about my current situation that are not ideal and that really need changing. Grateful for any advice you may have!

Maisie Middleton said...

Happy happy birthday (penumbra!)

So, you've got me utterly hooked on Crazy Ex Girlfriend and it is ace. You have added a little joy into my life (which is perfectly timed as I am having a Dear Mum kind of a week too). Thank you xx

WOL said...

Hi. Belgianwaffle sent me. Great party you're having. Hope you don't mind that I'm a bit old school. I don't LOL. I guffaw. I have also been known to chortle.

Birthday Penumbra. The penumbra is the shadow around a total eclipse, which is what my birthdays are these days -- a gradual darkening presence. If one hides, and remains still and quiet, eventually they go away.

Hope your birthday penumbra is more light-filled, like the glowing halo of light around the bright birthday streetlamp. Oh, and raspberry chocolate chip gelato. Any birthday devoid of raspberry chocolate chip gelato is not worth bothering about.

I do not have a ouipette, or a dog of any stripe. I have a fat(cat)boy. He has a perfectly lovely furry kitty bed with leopard spots that he refuses to sleep in. Why should he? Mine is a lot bigger and has a soft mattress, a comforter, and a (human) bedwarmer.

Nutritionists and other such medical busybodies advise us to eat more fruits and vegetables. Chocolate comes from cacao, which grows on a tree, which makes chocolate a fruit. I knew you'd want to know.

Oh, and some guy named Felix Cumpleaños said to tell you hi.

Rebecca said...

Seeing as these made me weep with laughter, and I live in this country whose recent election is terrifying ever normal human everywhere, I hope they are an appropriate addition to your birthday penumbra. Enjoy! Whoops. Might not link, but worth doing as DIY b'day cheer.
http://mashable.com/2013/12/24/damn-you-auto-correct-2013/#wPI.A6JFakql

BDM said...

It was truly difficult to get past the Twix Apple Fluff Salad. In all sincerity for the joyful occasion, may your penumbra enjoy the boundless servings this recipe appears to provide!

Lynn said...

Happpy birthday hope your penumbra is still going on.

Great episode this week, loads of pus and some castration and a bit of animal chasing, tears and laughter, who could want more #toptelly

please can i ask a favour. My nephew and his girlfriend are visiting Brussels next week, can you recommend anywhere two super cool twentysomethings might like to go - they are into music, art coffee etc. I am looking after their two goldfish so hoping nothing goes wrong and dont have to make an emergency dash all the way to thirsk.

Thanks xxx

Waffle said...

Lynn

Ooh! Well, museum wise, the new MIMA is fun (street art, alternative stuff) and the WIELS cultural centre in a former brewery is a winner with the young and hip.

There are good bars and cafés and hip shopping on and around Rue de Flandre (John & Rose Art Café, Roksam, Chicago, - I like Pipaillon for coffee and breakfast) and of course Rue Dansaert - the canal end is younger (Life is Beautiful does good cocktails).

I hope they have fun!

Lynn said...

Thank you for the suggestions, they are on their way now, am sure they will have a fab time.

Thanks again xxx

Anonymous said...

The other chickens are now emulating Nicole (the escapologist chicken) today I had to go and rescue Sylvia from next door's garden, having gone through the hedge she couldn't get back again. This is getting ridiculous! We're having to give away all the eggs to apologise for the chaos they're causing. It's also hilarious, knocking on someone's door and saying 'Excuse me, my chicken's in your garden', never gets old.
I walked past Beckett House last week when it was freezing cold and there were people queuing round the block to have their papers checked which broke my heart. But then I saw two women going up and down the line offering free hot drinks from flasks. They weren't being political, religious, it was a personal act of kindness - isn't that lovely? I was so impressed that I went over to talk to them and I'm painfully shy - which is how I know they were doing it out of the good of their hearts. It made me feel better all day.
Your post about your Mum made me cry, it's the not being able to talk to the dead which hurts so much, I just want to sit down with my Dad, or Chris, and a coffee and chat.
Anyway, I hope you had a splendid birthday penumbra
Julia

ganching said...

Please update your blog soon because every time I click on it to check if there is anything new the words CUSTARDY PUS leap out at me which makes me feel a little ill.

(Hope you had a lovely birthday.)

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ghada sayed said...



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ghada sayed said...



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Harshit Sharma said...

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اعرف حصري said...


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