Saturday, 30 April 2016

Idiot Brain

Hello. My name is The Idiot Brain, apparently

(This was entirely accidental, but it seems terribly appropriate)

Here I am cutting the - if I say so myself and I do, having just eaten the leftovers - excellent Mary Berry sponge I brought along.

I really enjoyed Thursday night's event in Brussels Waterstones. There was an excellent discussion about which world or Belgian leader would look best rendered in cake (Didier Reynders = too grey, David Cameron = too pink, Justin Trudeau = too beautiful). Someone said "can I ask a personal question" sending me spiralling into terror and then asked something totally gentle and not searching. Quite a lot of people I know and adore were there, smiling at me encouragingly and I only talked myself into a dry mouthed corner once or twice.

If you are so inclined you can listen to a PODCAST of the Paris event, here. I have not been able to listen to more than twenty seconds because it turns out I still click my tongue as if attempting to echolocate when nervous and it's mortifying.

Since then I have been in a slump, mainly eating carbohydrates and catching up on Line of Duty. My current position - post-burrito sofa pythoning, catching up on the end of The People v OJ Simpson (my recording of which came with a tantalising glimpse of something I believe is called An Island Parish about Shetland, the minute or two I saw featuring not only A CHICKEN RACE but a Shetland pony show, I must investigate closer) - looks unlikely to change any time soon.


Trip to the far-flung, high-pitched vet for expensive tortoise maintenance

Impending sequence of child/Belgian holidays putting paid to my all-important brooding in silence time

Bored of waking at 5am

Generally a maelstrom of conflicting unmanageable emotions and insecurities

Unsure what to do next, workwise

The delectable Eric Kayser bakery was supposed to open a branch nearby on Thursday but has STILL not opened

Child turns 14 on Tuesday and I am fairly confident 14 was the actually WORST age for me, let's hope it's not hereditary

Dog is super extra whiny today for no apparent reason (hail trauma?).


Delicious custard doughnut

Apparently this is the last day of super shit weather for a while

Have decided I am allowed to have an additional treat in form of replacing my super expensive Portrait of a Lady body cream

Season 2 Kimmy Schmidt

Got a couple of really lovely emails/tweets from people who have read book


As per above (50% emotional maelstrom, 50% carbohydrate)



Anonymous said...

The book is the best. Go the book. And Aperol SMASH ooh and doughnut :) xx

blackbird said...

Am loving hearing your voice on the podcast and my book IS ON THE WAY but may be on a ship for all I know as it seems to be taking so long.

Betty M said...

Have I managed to miss details of all London based launch events for The Book? Surely not!

Agnes said...

I asked the personal question, sorry for making you anxious. I am loving the book, halfway through already and learning loads about French history, art and cakes. Taking my two boys to Paris next week, during yet another Belgian school holiday, and I am planning on trying more cakes. Your honedt account is really delicate and touching and it was lovely meeting you just before so I am reading the words hearing your voice. Hugs!

Patience_Crabstick said...

My copy of your book arrived this week! I'm excited to read it but I am forcing myself to finish Point Counter Point first.

Unknown said...

Congratulations Emma. You look great. I'm waiting for my Amazon copy to arrive, but I did see your book in the wild in Amsterdam Waterstones yesterday.
Kate x

ourgirlineuskadi said...

Kindled your book (totally and unashamedly using that as a verb) and spent the weekend absorbed in it, much to the chagrin of the boyfriend and dog.
As a fellow expat and eater, as someone who has also made mistakes and as someone who has felt adrift, your book (as your blog) resonated profoundly.
And here is where it gets pretty freaky deaky - my boyfriend's parents have been divorced for over 20 years. Following a catalogue of what amount to near Shakespearian events, they have fallen for each other once again.
I read the passages about reunion to my boyfriend this morning and he said "we're buying that book for them!"
I left a revew on Amazon, without the overshare, but wanted to tell you all about it.
Looking forward to the next book (said in a totally none pressurising way)

Waffle said...

Agnes - It was a really lovely question and not about Proust or politics so I was very happy. Thank you so much and I have fun in Paris xx

Patience - You were a QUESTION on Thursday! A question! Derek had prepared these flashcards with random words and phrases I had to explain on them and you were one of them.

ourgirlineuskadi - Ha, that's so lovely! I hope they enjoy it!

Renia Lakomy Edwards said...

I just finished listening to the podcast (after finishing the book first and leaving short but glowing 5 * reviews on Amazon and Goodreads) and LOVED hearing your voice. You are totally imagining any tongue clicking, you were the right amount of accomplished published author and friendly and funny. Please write more books- you can definitely fictionalise the events of your family lives- named changed to protect the not-so-innocent etc :)

Anonymous said...

Am devastated. Totally missed that you were going to Waterstone's. Any second chance in sight? Tilia

Waffle said...

Tilia - Oh no! Nothing planned but if I do, I will let you know.

cruella said...

Renia, your comment led me to think of Gerald Durrell and his loving, fun and insightful accounts of family life in Crete:-) A favourite summer read, every year. Anyone who hasn't yet had the pleasure, please read at least "The Picnic".

Unknown said...

Cruella- I used to read Gerard Durrell when I was a child- time to revisit it I think! Thanks for the tip!

Unknown said...

They are currently showing a delightful TV series here in the UK, simply called The Durrells, based on Gerald's trilogy - I highly recommend it.
We had an amazing orange custard mini doughnut served for breakfast at the wonderful hotel near Rome, where we stayed last weekend. Unfortunately, they were not part of the (splendid, delicious) buffet, but served at the table in a basket with other pastries, so husband and I had to take turns. Food was predictably excellent in Italy, that pizza with courgette flowers (thanks for liking and commenting) was so good.

Anonymous said...

Sorry this is a bit late but re the Island Parish Shetland programme - you MUST iPlayer it! It is totally up your street, so far as to be practically inside your front door. There is HIGH DRAMA over whether the Shetland foal will win a prize or DESTROY its owners reputation. Also miniature knitted Vikings and a nun with a power drill.

Mandy said...

May I ask a personal question? I must know what burritos are like in Brussels. Do tell.

Waffle said...

Mandy - Until a month ago they were hideous, tragic, made by me using Old El Paso (made in Sweden) sachets. But now we have a PROPER BURRITO PLACE run by a gentleman from California who is all farm to table-y and not scared of spice. PRAISE NATHAN.

Anon - Oh dear lord, I hope I can still get this on iPlayer, it is obviously perfection.

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