Wednesday, 4 December 2013

Advent 4

Calendar offering:


A recipe for some species of nut cluster. No, I don't think so.

Etsy offering: cat.



Wednesday has been a relentless arse, as it usually is. I have little to say about it. I am very behind on loads of stuff, particularly the festival of St Creepygloves of Childrenbarrel (Friday), whose arrival I don't really believe I should be compelled to celebrate. The children do not agree. I crumble and find myself muttering swear words in the FNAC queue. The FNAC does not even have Ripley's World of Massive Goitres 2014. Why am I here? Who knows. My flies are open and I am covered in crumbs. This is what happens when I leave the house.

However: I have made macaroni cheese and there are leftovers and I have also made some progress with the Appalling Work Mountain of Pre-Festivity Terror and we got some nice compliments about Facegoop today.

Speaking of which, there is new Facegoop about grown-up sparkly nails in which I get to call M a capybara in the Guardian, which pleased me. Clicks mean Christmas presents.

Anything to report your end?

10 comments:

Esme Weatherwax said...

Reading this has made me realise I created my own relentless arse of a Wednesday by being one. Insight comes too late. Maybe a slightly more self aware Thursday can make amends. Let's hope there's less runny dogshit squidging through the holes of an inadequate carrier bag and more taking responsibility for MY beeswax and nobody else's. The glittery nails are lovely, makes me want to rainbow the range on each ill-kempt fingerstump.....I'm a princess too dammit! Don't let the orthopedic shoes and faint whiff of poo fool you....

B said...

Your advent calendars may be some sort of subconscious attempt to tamp down Christmas enthusiasm? At least, that's what I'm surmising from the subdued reaction to their daily "offerings" (the recipe was shit). I think this weekend, post-birthday, is when it all starts to be fucking jolly or something.

Marina Carstens said...

I got on the school bus this morning and one of my students told me to cover my mouth or else I would be sickened by the yellow dust of China.

frau antje said...

In the scenes from the saint's life they show the archaic ritual where he was hidden in a coffin so he could jump out and surprise the children, it was called The Spirit of Christmas, makes me laugh just thinking about it.

Plus, he has some nice cloaks, or are they tabards?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b0gI0uJ4s2I

Patience_Crabstick said...

Nut clusters--no thank you. They are the kale of desserts.

My Wednesday ended in a pleasing way because I used the last hour of work--you know, that hour when you feel you shouldn't have to do any work because there is only an hour left in the day--to construct an ergonomic workstation in my cube. I did this by stealing 18 phone books from around the office (and from the office building next door) and stacking my computer and keyboard on them. It is brilliant and I'm sure it will result in me being a size 2 by Christmas.

breakfastlady said...

Nut clusters is not Christmas. And I am at a loss with advent calendars. In mad rush (see below) I bought choc advent calendars for the first time - no pictures, no bloody nothing when you open the door except a poxy chocolate. Kids couldn't give a hoot, but I am distraught. I want snowy scenes, baby jesus in a manger and donkeys.

We're moving house today in teeth of 100mph winds and snow. Yeay us. Porch roof has blown off upstairs - not our problem thank god, cartwheeling corrugated plastic sheeting aside. Meanwhile, the ninja removal men have packed our full recycling bin onto the lorry along, no doubt, with 103 other Things I Will Need. It's all going splendidly so far.

cruella said...

Advent calendar: A friend of mine left me hers since the family went to South Africa and had no use for it (maybe she didn't ask her kids). It's a red wooden locomotive with little drawers where you can stuff tiny gifts. I bought some pathetic attempt at wiener gum (?) at Ikea and put two in each drawer. There wasn't enough in the bag to make it to Christmas and some were licorice which neither of them likes. They don't know it, but these days of plenty won't last. There will be a morning with nothing but black stuff in the box and then eventually - nothing. But that's life, right?

Word verification: worm-gear

Nimble said...

I bought sparkly nail polish last night and it's Face Goop's fault. I was buying presents for others and rewarded myself with polish and lipstick.

Waffle said...

Nimble - GOOD. I am delighted by this. I hope you like it.

Waffle said...

Cruella - The advent calendar thing made me laugh and laugh. MMMMMMM LIQUORICE *weeps*