Friday, 20 December 2013

Advent 20

Today dawns with a cheery Christmas card from the Ukkel binmen, who bring glad tidings of ... incorrectly disposed bio-waste? Sharps? Someone getting a toe amputated with a pirate's cutlass (that is some next level household refuse)?

These are all seasonal feelings I have expressed or espoused recently, but it might not be the most upbeat way to ensure you get a nice Christmas box.

Thank goodness, then, for the advent envelope:

A chocolate wrapped cloud! In the foggy confusion of my morning brain, I instantly decided this was a nut cluster. Do not ask, I have no idea why, since a nut cluster is not remotely cloud-like (M said "clearly your brain is shutting down and demanding a Nutrageous", which seems plausible). In fact it was a chocolate covered marshmallow, as is perfectly obvious, when you have a functioning neurone or two, and it was delicous:

I have forgotten to take a picture of the Etsy calendar. It had .. no, I forget. A candle? Maybe?

Today has been a heady blend of VAT returns, sickness, stupidity, distraction and a mince pie.


- someone paid me.

- made a lemon cake.

- got a new commission.

- got my nailbrush gift from my friend, who threw in a small Japanese confectionery as a bonus.

- New Facegoop desperation gift guide is out, dealing with 'what to do if you freak out and run away from the shops tomorrow' (this is totally going to happen to me). Very grateful for any clicks. *forelock tug, obsequious clasped hands*


- had to pay most of money received back out to social security.

- Full of contagion.

- Fell over the dog on the street and shouted at him even though it was about half of each our faults.

- butter for lemon cake may have been rancid.

- Nowhere near ready to get on the boat to England tomorrow night, which, nevertheless, is what is going to happen. So few presents, so little time. Or inspiration. Or money.

- Have absent-mindedly picked a hole in my top lip and concealer brush is lost somewhere between London and here.

Enough. Fill me in on any puny triumphs you have wrested from the jaws of advent meltdown.


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Thanks for asking!
My triumph is that today I found out I used my credit card at Target (big dept. store) to buy Justin Bieber wrapping paper (to wrap The Girl's presents) ONE (1) DAY after hackers stole millions of credit card #s!

Not a puny triumph, exactly, considering the possible consequences, but an entirely accidental one on my part.

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Finally got the tree put up. Five inches of clear acrylic with LED colors emanating from the interior, plugged into USB port, and sitting atop a little wooden torte box with Hotel Sacher burned in the lid.

Puny enough for ya?

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I am not bold enough to pick a fight directly with your facegoop commenters, so coming to make fun of them over here. The best bit of facegoop on the Guardian are the ubiquitous commenters who very seriously criticise E and M for not providing SERIOUS advice. If you haven't read them already head on over to the last minute Christmas presents post just to chortle about the comment which talks about the standard of reviews on men's grooming products lately being "shamefully low". Shameful! Ha!

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