Sorry, I missed a day. There were attenuating circumstances (visitors, nits. Possibly now on reflection, visitors with nits, sorry visitors).
I have just agreed to let my children set a fire in the garden just so that they would stop playing the guitar.* I have reached this point.
The dog had one of its periodic gastric explosions in the night so 7-8am was three rolls of kitchen paper, bottle of bleach, skewer for the gaps between the floorboards and all the swear words time.
Both children have nits, obviously.
*L has just acquired a guitar and now my head feels like it might be about to rip itself off my neck and just run away to escape the strumming.
I have to write F four postcards by tomorrow morning to be provided to his teacher and taken on his class Dutch language seaside trip next week. What on earth am I supposed to write? I can hardly say I am missing him or tell him about amusing household incidents since HE IS STILL HERE.
Do you remember the tiny turtle crochet kit Google translated from Korean ("aha, it looks so perky")? Probably not. Anyway, having been definitively beaten by this 'Age 6+' kit, I have finally found someone skilled, soft-hearted and suggestible enough to pressure into MAKING THE TURTLE.
"Armor with hard shell, I am going to defend my homeland". I feel this is a somewhat ambitious claim for a crocheted tortoise.
Turtle "volunteer" trying to decipher the cryptic and fierce instructions:
TURTLE (sort of):
"It looks" said her husband R thoughtfully, his head on one side "like one of those rasta hats".
Which, once seen, cannot be unseen, so we have called him Bob.
As well as Bob and the guitar, and a frog shaped clicking keyring and a tiny wooden rhino with an even tinier wooden rhino inside and a pomegranate and a small stone elephant and a set of sculpting chisels for the boys (they are not believers in travelling light), Les and Rob brought me the most beautiful tea cup and saucer and perfectly formed small plate for cake, as modelled here by Bob:
Even though it is nowhere near my birthday.
There is a coffee eclair somewhere in this house and it is my settled intention to locate and eat it now. I hope Wednesday was kind to you.