The theme of the school fête this weekend is "Belgium". The call for Belgian flags has gone up, and the tickets feature, of course, a cone of chips.
So I find myself wondering what, exactly these are, and how they fit in?
Initially I thought 'kangaroo', but is that a tail curving over the giraffe's back? And if so, is it in fact a squirrel? Inquiring minds must know. The shades and headband say kangaroo to me, on balance. Please weigh in with your thoughts.
This is easy. It is a giraffe wearing a veil. She looks a little Bridezilla. I hope you have cleared your outfit with her.
I think this is my favourite. Look at his eyelashes, like something Shu Uemura would come up with, and his long neat row of incisors! I am in love. I hope they put him up for auction after the festivities, when, hopped up on plastic beakers of warm vin de table, cabin fever and relief that it is all over for another year, I will definitely be bidding. I fear not, because I think he incorporates a canteen chair.
A tent, disguised as a giant tortoise. With my child for scale. I fully respect this. I could be reconciled to camping if my tent looked like this.
Our own household's role in this year's festivities throws no light on this papier-mâché menagerie. F is performing highlights from the oeuvre of Jacques Brel, a school ritual as immutable and oft-repeated as 'the Egyptians' or 'the water cycle' but for me, far more welcome. We have spent a considerable amount of time studying the great man's performances on YouTube for choreographical tips (very poor dentistry, but danced like a demon, Brel, a real bête de scène, I never get tired of watching). I am particularly tickled that the 3ème primaires will be performing "Ca sent la bière', because a year that goes by without small children singing drinking songs at school events is a wasted one in my opinion.
L is engaged in loftier things: he is taking on the role of the Duke of Wellington at the battle of Waterloo. Here he is, contemplating the heavy responsibility of leading troops into war, in a highly historically inaccurate outfit. He has made his own sword.
I suppose it's not too bad. The facial expression is right, at least. The man in the hire shop kept proudly displaying the lacy cuffs, as an alluring special feature (at €15 for 3 days hire L should look like Liberace, I reckon) and I kept tucking them back in, even mindful of my duty towards historical truth, hem hem.
He has one line:
"Allons, old fellows, nous allons combattre ces envahisseurs de français" which he is supposed to say with an English accent. This is proving impossible, despite my extensive coaching. He can speak English, and obviously French, but he can't do the one with the accent of the other. I suggested he said the whole thing in English, but apparently that kind of ad-libbing is frowned upon. I am not quite sure what exactly this performance is going to consist of, because apparently it also features the Smurfs, and Godefroid de Bouillon. Total history.
I promise to report back.