Also, my facial leprosy has spread to my hands and neck and even my eyeballs are itchy, so I declare my seven days of healthy living a failure, some kind of allergy possibly to blame and tonight my dinner has been two miniature bakewell tarts made from hooves and transgenic maize and a cappuccino flavoured Cornetto. Perhaps with an antihistamine chaser. That should sort it out, or else I resort to commenter Beagle's suggestion I just get with the programme and go and see a lovely Belgian dermatologist. She also pointed me in the direction of this most excellent David Sedaris piece about Parisian medical professionals which made me laugh out loud, as the youth do not say. I especially liked:
I raised my hand, international dental sign language for 'there is something vital I need to communicate'. He removed his screwdriver from my mouth and I pointed to the screen.
'Ils ont mangé des souris en brochette' I told him, meaning 'they have eaten some mice on skewers'.
That is all for now, I think.