In the absence of a baby elephant butler, I can offer you a slightly fuzzy photograph.
Here, finally, is Kai Mook, the baby elephant with the most uncertain gestation period in the history of inept Belgian animal husbandry. This is the best picture Fingers and I managed to get on our epic trip to see him some months ago. We spent many hours on meandering Belgian trains going through places that looked like this:
It took longer than seemed geographically possible. I mean, Belgium is SMALL. I would have thought we could have reached at least, oooh, Austria in the time it took us. Maybe Denmark.
(Fingers tutted like an old lady throughout. He is hilariously prissy company sometimes.)
We arrived in Antwerp in the rain with Fingers levitating with anxiety that we might be too late. I'm still unsure how you can be too late for a baby elephant. I mean, they live a fair while, don't they?Then we squinted through the drizzle at this:
Fingers examined Kai Mook with intense concentration for about thirty seconds. Then he turned to me.
"Ca y est. Je l'ai vu. On y va?".
(Ok, I've seen him. Shall we go?)
"Oh. Ok then".
So we did. And we had a waffle, and Fingers had a ride in an orange and gold stag beetle.
I don't know where I think I'm going with this, except that it was a fuck of a lot more fun than today.
Go on, how was your Wednesday? Baby elephants, or vomiting on trams?