It's about time I kicked things off for the VILLAGE FÊTE.
Of course, I want it to be bigger and better and more organised than last year, but I myself am none of those things, so it will be the same lame heap of disorganised nonsense it was then. But! Who cares! There will be cake and vegetables and office supplies and we will all have fun. YES.
The Village Fête Rules 2009
I cannot be bothered with many rules. If you want to make some up, put them in the comments. I am happy to incorporate them.
Entries close on 31 August 2009.
If there is at least ONE entry in a category, I will also enter, to ensure there is an actual competition.
The judges decision is final even though at the time of writing there are no judges. The putative judges reserve the right to invent any arcane and nonsensical rules they find just or amusing.
Entries must fall within one of the categories listed below:
This year, additional points are available for vegetable homages to implausible creatures you have seen on YouTube. I am of course mainly thinking of pygmy jerboas here, but I will also consider sneezing pandas, Caplin Rous, that thing that raises its arms for tickles and anything else, frankly.
Again, there is an optional refinement to the cake class this year, which is cakes representing works of literature. Jen from Cakewrecks judged last year. I just have to repeat that - JEN FROM CAKEWRECKS. Yes. This blog will never reach such heights again so I have to remind you of our past greatness. I will ask her again but you know, she's an internet phenomenon and all, so I doubt she's got time.
You too can make facial hair from commonly available stationery items. Or whatever else you can steal.
Pets whatever, really. Pet fancy dress? Pet that looks most like its owner? Pet with the demonstrably smallest brain?
You know, stuff made of material or whatever. This is not my specialist subject. Dr Capybara might have to help out.
Because I would hate to restrict you creatively with my attempts to categorise. Go crazy. Craft away.
Entries can be made by email, or by uploading an entry on your own blog and linking to the Village Fête. Telling me about it would also be A Good Plan.
There will be PRIZES. The prizes might be shit. You have been warned.
Anyone who helps me sort out shit technically is guaranteed to win a PRIZE. I am talking: sorting out a Flickr account for categories. Pretty decorative bunting. Maybe a special Village Fête masthead. Anything that would be good but that my stunted prehistoric brain is too primitive to comprehend. Just email or comment your clever suggestions, explained as if to your deaf great aunt.
I declare the Village Fête open! Suggest helpful stuff in the comments! And I will stop using exclamation marks!