You might recall that at the hospital this week, Lashes and I amused ourselves with a packet of wrestling cards. They are sitting on the table with me now and causing me all sorts of amusement.
For some reason, I am getting the most fun from imagining them as a group of fathers of teenage children. Which has led me to ponder which of them the fourteen year old me would have been most mortified to be picked up from school by. My own father almost never picked me up from school, since he was usually in another country, and didn't live with us anyway. Thank god. I can barely imagine the amount of horror struck eye rolling I would have had to put on, what with him having a BEARD. And a beer belly. And .. uuugh ... oh, just EVERYTHING. Sigh. Eyeroll. I don't know why this is tickling me so much. I think I'm having a slightly teenage phase at the moment. Lashes certainly is. Everything I say is greeted with the eyeroll and "c'est pas drôleeeeuh"
So. Question: which would be the worst school run dad?
1. Super Crazy
I imagine he would be full of 'hilarious' pranks to play on all your mates. OH THE HORROR. Let the jaws of the earth swallow you up rather than watch him.
2. Triple H
He looks kind of stern. I think he would want to see your homework diary the minute you stepped into the car. And I hope you haven't sneaked any make up in your school bag and put it on in the loos, or rolled your waistband round five times to make your school skirt shorter, because he would freak. "GOD. This is SO UNFAIR. I HATE YOU".
3. The Mouth of the South Jimmy Hart
Can you just hear him singing along to Country & Western standards with the window rolled down? Can you imagine stalking over to him with a million yard death stare, dying inside a little bit more every second? Because I can.
"DAD why can't you just wear normal clothes? You look like a DICK. Uuuuurgh".