Saturday, 11 April 2009

The Belgian Waffle Easter Treasure Hunt Quiz Thing

Here is your Belgian Waffle Easter treasure hunt. It's a bit crapola because I am a bit drunk on warm rosé and ice cream (yes, ice cream can make you drunk in the right circumstances. Don't argue with a slightly drunk panda who hasn't moved in days) and the CFO is watching Kitchen Nightmares really loud ("there will be strong language" I warn him "Channel 4 says so. That doesn't mean shackass". "Pff", he scoffs "I got a formal written warning for saying 'fuck' last year"). Bear with me.

The challenge is as follows.

1. You must locate these three chicks on these pages by following my clues. I have hidden them in old posts and I don't know how you will find them. I have not thought this through at all. Ah, well. Um, I will give you the month to make it easier. Ready? Ready! Yeah.

April 2009

Garment for a guru

February 2009

Made out of lips and testicles

January 2009

C'est quoi un weepette?

2. Suggest three people who ought to join the Belgian government. They need not be Belgian or politicians. Give reasons for your answer.

3. Complete the following tie breaker:

Capybaras are the best kind of rodents because .....

The winner, to be decided entirely arbitrarily by me, will win some Belgian stuff. Good, high quality stuff that does not come out of my cupboard full of shit.

Go! Run, my little ones!


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M. said...

Am I the only chocolate-less person at home along this Easter Saturday?

1. Mr Purple Beak - The Mystery Object competition.
Orange Face - Cuisine du Terror
Pistachio Flava - Oscar, I suspect, though his pic is not loading.

2. Why, the three charming fellows above, of course! Dem tree chix be givin' Ucclehood some love, no doubt.
Their core values: Cuteness. Fluffiness. Colourfulness.
Their policy: Easter chocolate - all year round!
Their stance on the Walloon/Flemish schism: Wallon donc, encore un morceau de flamiche?*

3. Capybaras are the best kind of rodents because they are plump and juicy and could feed 2-3 dinosaurs per serving, no problem.

*The chicks are terrible punsters.

Mya said...

I'm too drunk to answer these questions. Apart from the Belgian politician one. I think Gordon Brown, my Auntie Syb and Ed and Oucho could make a good fist of it. Capybaras are the best kind of rodents because their name is almost an anagram of 'crappy arse bra' which is a product I am definitely interested in trying out. Perhaps they have one at your Spa spa? Are they all in the nuddy? Be careful not to show your distaste too strongly...Belgians and nudists have feelings too yer know. Enjoy. And if they stick a hosepipe up your bum, make sure you get a pic for the blog! Lovely!

Mya x

mothership said...

Good grief. M is almost...telepathic? And so very swift, it's uncanny.

1. wot M sed, thats wot I wuz gunna say, Miss, honest I wuz but she sed it before i had the chance and i never anyway cuz yeh its not fair.

2. How about Larry, Curley and Mo? For shiggles.

Capybaras are the best kind of rodents because they look more like big, friendly, toothy, sheep and might have been invented by Lewis Carroll. Also no long unnerving tails.

Can I have a Caramac?

redfox said...

1. (I swear I went and found them myself!)
- mystery object competition
- cuisine du terror
- oscar

2. Otter researcher and veterinarian Dave Jessup, so the government can support lots of otters; Gordon Ramsey, because he will swear at everyone and fix Euro Government Nightmares; and Augustus Egg, because he has the most wonderful name in the history of the world and additionally is long dead and won't bother anyone

3. Capybaras are the best kind of rodents because they are the most noble and just look at this one in a canoe!

redfox said...

PS. That facebook link isn't to the researcher's page, it's all about an otter, so it is actually worth clicking on.

Artichoke Queen said...

M, I am also home alone & chocolate-less today. I had a lovely bacon sandwich for brunch. You?

1. Grapey is just above the HTtm's mitre in the mystery object competition. Orangey is apparently a key ingredient in the CFO's belgian onion soup in the Cusisne de Terror. Limey is hangin with Oscar.

2. The next generation of Belgian politicians:
a. George W Bush (or Dick Cheney, I am happy to have the Belgians choose). The sheer glorious spectacle of seeing them trying to deal with a liberal euro population made up of what they would consider communists is just too good to resist.
b. Hugo Chavez (or Kim Jong Il, again happy to have an election). Because the conflict with (a) is making me rub my hands together with glee. And I would love to see them try to operate in a democracy. Chaos! Tears! Tantrums! Oh, can't wait.
c. Weird Al Yankovic. Do you Euros know Weird Al? Any country with big floating blue brains and giant orange bunnies would get on famously with Weird Al.

3. The adorable, juicy little capybara is the best rodent ever because the Roman Catholic church has deemed it a fish and therefore it can be safely eaten all throughout Lent.

Artichoke Queen said...

Shackass! I also meant to say that new artwork hanging in the Euro parliament? The one insulting all the countries? Weird Al could have done that in his sleep.

M. said...

I would like to change my answer no. 3 to: "Capybaras are the best rodents because they are the most suspicious", as evidenced by Redfox's superb photographic research. Where is he going in that canoe? Also otter researchers should be on EVERY government.

Artichoke Queen: I had leftover curry, your Highness. Now I am preparing to try to replicate Pierre Hermé's tarte au citron. I will call it "dinner".

(Very) Lost in France said...

Mystery Object Comp
Cuisine de Terror
et enfin Oscar

My three suggestions for the Belgian government

Prince Charles as he could do with a job

Paris Hilton - you must have heard her song 'Paaariis for Preeesident'. We could all make her dreams come true then hopefully she'll eff off and leave us all in peace - I mean, who can even name a Belgian politician, never mind identify one from their photo because they never make the international news. Of course the Belgians would be pretty pissed off but then, who cares....!

A Chacoan Peccary - well it can't be any worse then what Belgium currently has on offer can it?

Capybaras are the best rodents because...

(Very) Lost in France said...

Bummer, link didn't work. Try this one

You'll have to cut and paste it though. VLiF

Wife in Hong Kong said...

M, another chocolate-free Easter out east. In Beijing no-one even knew it was Easter and there was not an egg or a bunny or a fish in sight. So we ate Peking Duck and pretended it was entirely normal.

Jaywalker said...

Whilst M is the first and has a pretty convincing Belgian government line up, I feel her capybara tie breaker lets her down slightly. Also, I think some of you think she is actually me. She isn't. But still. Anyway, I owe her armfuls of shit anyway that I haven't managed to take to the post office.

Mothership - you can have a caramac. It hasn't been eaten by anyone or anything and is sitting awaiting your address.

The winner of the capybara tiebreak has to be RedFox, for the capybara in a canoe photo. WHY do you need to be in a canoe caypbara??? You are an excellent nageur. I have seen you.

Artichoke Queen, I feel, has the most inspired Belgian Government. Ah, the fun we would have.

VLiF - I can't see your picture still, which is a shame as I am so surprised to find a peccary is a hog type thing (it sounds like a bird! A pecky one), that I can barely imagine what you have to offer capybara wise. Better luck next time. Nearly village fête time anyway.

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