2. Making the last chunk of yesterday vanish. 6pm onwards should do it.
3. Someone to go to Decathlon for me. Someone who, unlike me, will not get lost on the way and end up crying hysterically in an industrial estate in Mechelen as the GPS barks incomprehensible instructions in Italian.
4. New lips that don't invite me to destroy them.
5. A body double to go on holiday for me. One who will be nice and smile and say the right things and enjoy the potage and herself, while the real me hides out in a warm dark cupboard with the internets being horrible.
6. One of my friends here, within hugging distance. Someone to say "well, you might behave like a shithead, but you are our shithead and we like you very much". Then maybe I would cry on their shoulder for a while, but hopefully not in a snotty way, because I know BMF would hate that. Violet might be ok with it, but still. It's not very considerate, is it.
7. A meal not entirely composed of white food.
8. A very softly lit human sized nest made out of the softest goat belly hair. The nest will have WiFi, many duvets and pillows, the complete oeuvre of PG Wodehouse and Nancy Mitford, limitless tea and small cakes, weepette fired heating, and an electric fence preventing entry.
However, if I have to choose just one, it would have to be erasing last night.
And since I can't have any of them, I'll have to just have these photos of the robot dance:
and this dog staring at cupcakes.
What would improve your day?
*We must of course take world peace, end to hunger and disease, reversal of global warming as a given in this list. Because otherwise I might seem petty and self-absorbed! And we couldn't have that, my goodness no.