This is just too funny. I am imagining the conversations in my local crack den. Given I do not frequent my local crack dens, I am assuming they speak like characters from PG Wodehouse. That's right isn't it?
Crack Addict #1: I say, old bean, you don't happen to have any crack do you? I'm positively gasping!
Crack Addict #2: Frightfully sorry old chap, I don't happen to have any on me, but I do have something absolutely top notch. It's tremendously good, you really should try it. Here.
CA#1: I say, it's bally peculiar, what? Quite a kick! What is the blighter?
Truly, the next time I find myself reaching for the M&Ms, I'll be making myself a kale and liver smoothie and instead of gin, granola, seaweed and bitter greens all round. Delicious!
Mocking the afflicted.
The CFO made Oscar a coat out of a jumper sleeve (Cashmere! Margaret Howell no less. But eaten to death by the mothbastards). It was quite the funniest thing I have seen for ages. He looks so seedy and sinister and downright awful. If I was 85 I could take him to bars in that coat and sit him on my knee and feed him pretzels and mumble while I drink vast quantities of sweet sherry. He would have terrible breath and so would I and my wig would be platinum blonde and filthy and askew. It' s something to look forward to, I suppose.
I love his pained expression. Again, again, Skinny McStupid!
My son the psychic
Lashes gave me this picture "of Oscar when he is grown up".
"That's fantastic darling" says Joyce Grenfell, vaguely. "But he looks a bit fierce, doesn't he? Is that me at the end of his lead?
"It is you, but that is the end of his tongue. And look, he has eaten the rest of us. There we are in his belly with a big os. Look, I have drawn his brain as big as a chou de bruxelles like you told us it was".