Monday, 18 August 2008

Resigned to our Fête



The lovely Zoe has been getting busy with the office supplies. This 'piece' is described by the artist as follows:



"This fine ear-ring, made out of two paperclips and twisted with the aid of a Bic biro and a lot of pain shows the creativity of the Artist That Is Now Called Zoe. They can be ordered by calling 999 or 100, depending on the country that you live in".





The delightful LivesbytheWoods has also been busy with the vegetables. Her piece is called 'Barbecue Carnage'. Before you scroll down, I must warn you that it a parental guidance certificate piece, featuring scenes of moderate vegetable violence. Quizzed on her vision, the artist explains that the raisins represent stray charcoal briquettes from the barbecue unwisely lit using lighter fuel. Other points of note are the prune wig, and the pop in/pop out pine nut eyes.




If you thought that was scary, I must warn you that the next piece is just indescribably bad and also very frightening. I apologise in advance. Please make sure no minors have access to this.


You know how I have been muttering for days about making the Belgian government on fairy cakes? Well, many of you will not be surprised to hear that this is in fact way more difficult than it sounds. Yes indeed! So I have started modestly, with our most recent ex Prime Minister, Guy Verhofstadt. If we can just take a little detour for some Belgian politics, I went on holiday for 2 weeks in July and on my return Belgium had once again mislaid its government. To lose one government may be seen as a misfortune, etc etc. Sort it out Belgium! Anyway; this is just so horrible, I really managed to creep myself out, especially with his lips. They are sort of obscene. I can't quite believe I have managed to make something so nasty. Yeesh.




So. Do not say you have not been warned. I give you:




Guy Verhofstadt the man








And Guy Verhofstadt the cake (he is 100% edible, if that helps. It doesn't help me at all):






Yeah, I am really really sorry. Sorry. And again, sorry. I am going to destroy him instantly because there is NO WAY I can sleep knowing Guy is in the house. I thought about trying to make him less horrible but I didn't even want to put my fingers on his tainted fondant skin.



Sorry.

14 comments:

La Belette Rouge said...

I have to ask, are you going to eat the Guy Verhofstadt cake? Oooh, I just threw up a little bit just from asking the question.;-)

Jaywalker said...

Hi there Belette
I am already on a manic sugar high from his offcuts, rejected eyes, and spare icing. Eating the whole PM would be deeply unwise I suspect.

justme said...

Just. Bin. Him. Now. Trust me on this....do NOT eat......sigh....

Jaywalker said...

I hear you Justme. You are right of course. But.. would it not be fun to box him up nicely and put him in someone's pigeonhole at work? Anonymously? Or would that constitute harassment? I think it probably would.

livesbythewoods said...

If you make another one, you've got The Proclaimers in cake. Much nicer.

Persephone said...

Does http://cakewrecks.blogspot.com/ know about this? (Mind you, that's for professional cakes, but still...) I'm with livesbythewoods on this one --- double up and go for the palatable Proclaimers.

Jaywalker said...

People, Whilst I see the likeness, surely you don't want me to inflict a second one of these on the world. Anyway, I rolled up his fondant face and threw it in the bin, then ate the cake underneath. Yum.

mountainear said...

Indescribably creepy. A Belgian horror story.

Mr Farty said...

You have a rare talent. Thankfully.

Jaywalker said...

Persephone - do you realise that Jen from Cakewrecks is actually judging the cake category? Get baking, woman!

Mountainear and Mr Farty - I am trying hard to see the lavish compliments heavily concealed in your comments.

Angela said...

He is brilliant. With all due respect, I would eat him in a second.

peevish said...

I would start with the lips.

He is brilliant. The world is a more interesting place for your efforts.

Jaywalker said...

Angela and Peevish, You are lovely but deeply disturbed.

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