Monday, 2 June 2008

Somewhere, in an alternate reality, my other self is peeling off her Givenchy gloves and ordering another Caipirihna

J: So what did you get up to at the weekend?

PC: Cocktails with the gang from Vuitton, saw the sexy Italian, Givenchy press sale.

J: Oh God, I don't want to know, but tell me anyway.

PC: Fabulous 100% cashmere black coat, catwalk sample, last forever classic, complete steal. Red dress Carrie Bradshaw would kill for, several pairs of fantastic kidskin elbow length gloves. Very Bond girl. You?

J: Bought a small shrub from an enormously fat bearded man in short shorts. Cleaned up a lot of excrement. Found a slug in the kitchen. The usual. Damien at the corner shop said I was looking "ravissante" though.

PC: An admirer! How exciting!

J: He's 50 and still lives with his dad. And he said the same to the CFO's mum last time she was staying. And to Dominique, and Claire who looks like a pre-op trannie. And Mauricette next door and she's about 80. I think he might have some kind of sexual compulsion problem.

PC: Darling, beggars can't be choosers. Did you leave your make up behind on the corridor of ennui again?


La Belette Rouge said...

I love that line: "Did you leave your make up behind on the corridor of ennui again?"

And, I think I would like a capirihna and a cashmere coat, red dress and black elbow lengths gloves too. When you talk to your self in the alternate reality would you be so kind as to ask her if she can get me in the sale.;-)

Jaywalker said...

Believe me, Belette, if I ever catch up with her I will have an extensive list of demands! And I should certainly hope she'll have us both on the guest list...

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